Oh my hell. Will someone please tell me to never bother watching another Resident Evil movie again? I've seen two for this movie series so far - Extinction (2007) and now Retribution (2012) - and I know I've seen the first one (2004). But there's also Apocalypse (2004), Afterlife (2010) and The Final Chapter (2016) and it's really important that I don't watch them. I do like Mila Jovovich and she is by far the best part of these ridiculous movies but it's just so dumb.
Basically - and yes, I know that this series is based on a horror video game and I know that the series has grossed $1,200,000,000 - but Retribution is a plot-free video game where the "characters" move from scene to scene, shooting things and trying to move to the next level. The "story" is that Alice has been stripped of her previous super-powers and captured by the Umbrella Corporation, held in HQ where they develop bio weapons and run self-contained simulations in places like "Moscow" and "New York" and, for some reason "Suburbia." A team goes in to rescue Alice; she ends up rescuing them right back, in addition to a little "girl" who is a clone/fodder for the bio weapon simulations.
Some old friends pop back (Oded Fehr and Michelle Rodriguez) and some old enemies too, I guess. The zombies are pretty good - fast and vicious and prone to ripping throats out, but not even enough to make this a "horror" movie - but there's just so much shooting (SO MUCH) and bad CGI. It's distracting and just all so dumb.
OH AND IT'S IN 3D, DEAR GOD
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