Tuesday, November 7, 2017

The Walking Dead S8E3 "Monsters" 11/5/17

How is it possible that an ultraviolent show full of flesh-eating zombies and people on the ragged edge of humanity is so fucking BORING?  And why are we three episodes in with only minimal Michonne?  Don't get me wrong - I'm grateful that we haven't much been subjected to her "chemistry" with Rick (*gag*).  But Michonne is a kickass fighter and I miss that.  Perhaps her Black Panther schedule meant she couldn't be around so much?  I suppose that's it.  Sigh.  Guess I can't put this off any longer. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ...

Sweet christ on a pony - King Ezekiel is STILL talking about their victories, one leading to another, and how they haven't lost a warrior yet.  He is obviously not up on his television tropes since this definitely means disaster for his war band by episode's end.  In the meantime, he and Carol and his fighters stick to their plan, remember their training and manage to decimate rather a lot of Saviors in several different places.

Morales makes Rick put his guns down and they talk and talk and fucking talk.  Nothing new is said.  Morales is all, you're a monster now, I'm a monster now, blah blah blah.  It seriously goes on for WAY too long and in addition to that being annoying, Morales calls Rick by his name practically every other sentence which makes no sense since there's only the two of them there.  Morales talks and talks and talks and no one cares, because who even remembers this guy?  And then, with no ceremony and HILARIOUSLY, Daryl comes up behind Morales and shoots an arrow into his head, just as Rick is all, "Wait - no!"  Daryl shrugs and retrieves his arrow; Rick looks stunned but that's sort of how he looks all the time now unless he's shouting at someone.

Meanwhile, outside, the Saviors have been called back into the building (where they will shortly be hunting Rick and Daryl).  Aaron takes advantage of the lull to get Eric to a quiet tree around the corner.  They pack Eric's gunshot wound as best they can and then Eric tells Aaron he needs to go back to the fight.  Aaron cries and snuffles and they both smooch and say "I love you."  Then Aaron gives Eric a rifle to defend himself and goes back to the fight, with many tearful backward glances.  You know this means Eric is going to die now, off-camera, right?  It would be touching if Eric had ever been given some depth character-wise.

Meanwhile, Tara, Morgan and Jesus are marching their captive Saviors back to the Hilltop.  Tara is very cranky about the prisoners but Jesus is insistent that they not be executed.  Morgan is even crankier about it - and seems to be holding onto his sanity by just a thread - and you know, I'm kind of with him and Tara on this.  The Hilltop is ill-equipped to contain a bunch of violent Saviors and I think this is a terrible idea on Jesus's part.  Luckily, they get interrupted when a small herd of walkers comes tumbling down a hillside into the group.  This is one of the best parts of the episode: seeing the zombies roll down the hill.  Tara, Morgan, Jesus et als fight the walkers; several of the tied-up captives get munched on.  But a string of captives take advantage of the distraction to make a run for it.

Morgan takes off after them, catches them and drops one or two.  Then Jesus catches up and he and Morgan fight about it.  Like, literally beat each other up over whether the captives should be killed or not.  Despite Morgan having his bo staff, Jesus gets the better of him with just his bare hands.  Morgan is pretty crazed here - seems like he's all all-or-nothing guy with respect to killing.  Personally, I miss Zen Morgan a bit: I think his philosophy was a tough sell in this post-apocalypse but Serial Killer Morgan is less interesting.  Finally, they stop fighting (Jesus wins, more or less) but Morgan.  Has.  Had.  Enough.  He's all, "I'm not right but that doesn't make me wrong."  As he runs off, unable to handle things right now, Tara calls after him, "Morgan! You are right!"

Meanwhile, the remaining Saviors who were shooting at Aaron's group are now inside, shooting at Daryl and Rick.  This goes on a LONG time (many, many bullets).  Neither Rick nor Daryl gets shot and Aaron's group finally comes in and picks off the Saviors.  Trouble is, there are no guns in this building like Dwight said there were.  Aaron runs out to check on Eric: there's a lot of blood under that tree, and Eric's abandoned rifle, and a walker in the distance who looks like it could be Eric.  Aaron has lots of sad feelings about this until another Alexandrian grabs him and leads him back to the rest of the group.  Rick comes out with that baby Gracie and a tearful Aaron says that he will take the baby to Maggie at Hilltop.

Meanwhile at Hilltop, that weasel Gregory has found his way home.  He shouts and begs and pleads (and is pretty funny in his weasel-osity).  Maggie makes him squirm for a while and then finally lets him in.  And then the sentry shouts for her: Tara and Jesus and their captives are at the gate.  Gregory vigorously protests letting them in and Maggie sends him off.  But she is reluctant, reminding Jesus that there are families - children - here.  Jesus pleads his case: we can't let them go and we can't kill them.  Maggie looks as though she's not entirely sure (but I'm guessing she'll let them live - and then regret it in the near future).

Rick and Daryl are the last to leave wherever it is they are.  A last Savior takes a shot at them and Rick makes a deal: if he tells them about the guns that were supposed to be there, they will give him a car and let him go - Rick gives him his word.  The Savior comes out with his hands up, tells them that the guns were moved a couple days ago (intel that Dwight apparently (?) didn't have).  Then Daryl shoots the guy in the head, dropping him.  Rick is all, but I gave my word!  And Daryl's all, dude, I so DNGAF.

Finally, King Ezekiel is crowing about his band's latest success.  Carol heads off to sweep the compound they just took.  Everyone else stands in the field and stabs the heads of Savior corpses to keep them from turning.  And then, Ezekiel catches sight of movement in a warehouse window.  He shouts for his people to take cover but it is too late: a massive volley of machine gun fire (the guns Rick and Daryl were hoping to find?) rakes the field, shredding a bunch of the King's men. That's okay just do not shoot the tiger.

Previously on The Walking Dead / next time on The Walking Dead

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