Flashback. Jesse Custer as a teenager, collecting money (and picking pockets) at the gate of Angelville, his family home, which does seances, Tarot card readings, divining and fortune telling, 'gator tours, finding lost pets, "gift shop closes at 5." Around lunchtime, a truck comes out from the main house to give him his lunch and collect the morning's takings; when Jesse tries to hold out, one of the guys ("TC" and "Jody") grabs him and wrenches his arm. After the truck returns to the main house, Jesse is so upset that he kills a friendly chicken that has been scratching around in the dirt. He feels so badly about this that he runs back to the house and tearfully begs a woman - his grandmother, I presume - to make it right. The woman reminds him that there is always a price for such a thing. Jesse seems willing to pay it, whatever it is, as he gently lay the little carcass on the table in front of her.
Now. Herr Starr has a plan in place to market Jesse as the new Messiah. While Jesse isn't interested in wearing a fancy 11th century cloak, he is willing to give speeches in front of carefully selected groups. In this case, a group of Catholic schoolkids. When his speech is interrupted by "the Armenians" brandishing guns and knives, Jesse takes them all on. First, he tries to use the Genesis Voice to get the men to drop their guns. The Voice doesn't work - which takes him aback, and makes Starr raise an eyebrow - so he then resorts to fisticuffs. Now, even though all the kids and nuns (and press, once notified) think he's a hero, the "Armenians'" guns were loaded with blanks and it was all arranged by Starr. Jesse is displeased at being used but Starr is all, it went viral and now we're booked on Kimmel so this is how we get the word out about you.
In New Orleans, Featherstone and Hoover are packing up their apartment - they are no longer required to stake out the apartment since Jesse is on board. Meanwhile, Cassidy is doing laundry (getting distracted by a thong of Tulip's in amongst his t-shirts). When he puts away some of Dennis's clothes, he checks out a website on his son's laptop: it's a vampire site of sorts, with videos of screaming people. He is transfixed for a moment before snapping out of it - it seems as though being good and not feeding on people is more difficult than he might have let on. When Tulip comes back from shopping for their road trip to Bimini (lots of SPF100 and a value-sized jug of vodka), she sits beside him on the bed and talks to him about what's to come with the two of them. It isn't clear that it's a fantasy until they start gettin' busy and Cassidy latches onto her neck, ripping out her throat with a big spurt of blood. Seems as though Dennis's worse proclivities are getting into his father's head. When Tulip REALLY comes back from shopping, she checks in on him and then goes to pack as he stares numbly out the window. Something's gonna have to give here.
On the outskirts of Hell. Eugene and Hitler run and run and run until they find themselves on the shore of a river. Hitler tells Eugene to ask the ferryman (Charon) for passage out since he doesn't belong here, then get on the boat and cross over. Eugene asks Hitler to come with him but the other man demurs. A nervous Eugene approaches Charon who summons the boat and who generally seems like a nice guy. So it's surprising when the Hell Administrator comes up to drag Eugene back to the cells and shoots Charon in the head with a (?) crossbow quarrel. Then Hitler comes up behind her, knocks her out and clambers onto the boat with Eugene. Blah blah blah they get back to the world and when Eugene invites Hitler to come home with him and meet his dad, Hitler runs off and darts down an alleyway. Because what this world needs now is Hitler on the loose. Also, I am really not that interested in Eugene and Hitler's adventures. I'm having a really hard time figuring out how this storyline connects with Jesse, Tulip, Cassidy et als.
New Orleans. Tulip finishes packing (she packs pretty light) but on her way out to load the car, she notices one of the little spy cameras that the Grail installed in their apartment. She shows it to Cassidy. He wonders if they should tell Jesse but she's all, what difference would it make? Tulip goes out to the car. Cassidy grabs up the dog to leave but stops when Dennis finds Tulip's underwear in his room. Dennis taunts him some and Cassidy is forced to admit that he doesn't think he can control himself with Dennis around. So he pushes Dennis out the window, into the sunlight, and cowers inside as his vampire son dies a pretty horrible, burning death. I'm not going to miss Dennis at all but that whole storyline just seemed a little pointless.
Cassidy and the dog join Tulip in the car, but then she gets out again and goes back inside to say goodbye to "Jenny," her only friend. (After she goes, Cassidy lets the dog go.) Jenny/Featherstone takes a few moments to get to the door and while she waiting, Tulip finds a trace of the same sticky gum that had been on that little spy camera. When Jenny/Featherstone finally comes out, she's holding her revolver behind her back. Tulip is also armed - but only with a screwdriver - and when the shit hits the fan, it's pretty obvious who's going down.
Jesse is about to board the Grail jet (to go to L.A., or wherever Kimmel is) when he gets a panicked call from Cassidy. He rushes off - and Starr immediately gets on the phone to Featherstone and Hoover, calling them idiots and telling them to cancel the ambulance Cassidy has called. Jesse gets back to the apartment to find Tulip bleeding out on the kitchen floor and Cassidy trying to save her. The bullet went right through her and there is blood everywhere. They can't stop the bleeding. Cassidy begs Jesse to use the Voice and Jesse tries it, but it still isn't working. A frantic Cassidy decides that the only way to save her is to turn her into a vampire but Jesse pulls him off her. They fight, Cassidy nearly feral, as Tulip convulses and struggles to breathe. Jesse holds Cassidy back and Tulip breathes her last as they watch. Cassidy is all why? I could have saved her and she might not have been like Dennis. Jesse, reluctantly, is all, there really is another way.
So then they are in Tulip's car, her lifeless body in the backseat, driving to Angelville. The fear and sadness on Jesse's face is palpable. Cassidy can't believe that Jesse let her die and says, "There's something I want to say. Something I been meaning to tell you for a long time. I hate you." Jesse all but rolls his eyes: "You hate me now? Just you wait." And as they turn down the L'Angell driveway, that damn chicken runs across the road.
The tag: God is still alive, in a hotel room somewhere, jazz on the radio, dog costume hanging up, beer cans and pill bottles strewn across the rumpled bed. We don't get to see Him, but when the toilet flushes and the bathroom door opens, the room is flooded with glory and light.
Previously on Preacher / next time on Preacher
48 minutes ago