Monday, September 5, 2011

True Blood episode recap "It Hurts Me Too" (S3E3)

Sookie fires Terry's gun as the werewolf charges.  Eric jumps in front of the wolf, catching the bullet, because dead werewolves can't talk.  (I'm guessing Sookie doesn't have silver bullets so I'm guessing that in this world, regular bullets kill weres.)  The were sees Eric bleeding and shifts into his nekkid human form, hoping to slurp up some V fresh from the source.  The vampire holds him off, demanding to know who his master is. The wolf won't tell, saying he's dead if he does (although Sookie picks "Jackson" out of his mind).  Eric's like, okay, and savages the were's neck.  Sookie looks on, all OMG, as the dying were's blood spreads across her living room rug.  Afterwards, she pouts a little that Eric didn't let her hear more of the were's thoughts but does thank him for saving her life.  She decides that she needs to get to Jackson, Mississippi, right away to track down Bill.  Eric rolls her eyes and tells her to try to stay out of trouble.

Russell puts out the flames on Lorena using some priceless, ancient tapestry, sending Talbot into conniption fits.  Bull sulks as the King tells him that he and Lorena are going to have to get along if they're both going to be in his court.  They chat for a bit, the King inquiring about Bill's relationship with Sookie, and then the King sends Bill to bed.

In the aftermath of the Drunken Redneck Beatdown in Merlotte's parking lot, Tara and the British vamp are at a cheap motel, having extremely weird/intense sex.  She cries for him to bite her but he pulls in his fangs, saying he won't do it if she wants him to.  That's twisted.  He flips her over and the weird/intense sex continues.  Afterwards, they cuddle a little, Tara amazingly relaxed, until he starts to ask her about herself.  She jumps out of bed and throws her clothes on.  Bemused, the vamp tells her his name - Franklin - and asks hers, but she runs out, thanking him for the evening.

Sam makes his way back to the Mickens's hovel, a little cranky about Tommy almost getting him killed.  He tells his family that he's going back to Bon Temps and just wanted to say goodbye to them.

At the Stackhouse-Fortenberry bachelor pad, Hoyt scoffs a little about Jason's new found dream of becoming a copy.  He tries to help Jason go through the online practice test - Jason goes 0 for 22 - but he's distracted by thoughts of Jessica.  Jason tells him that he just needs to move on.

Pam has her head buried between Fangtasia's newest dancer's legs when her phone rings.  Super-annoyed, she answers.  It's Jessica, freaking out because the dead trucker in her basement has disappeared.  Pam's like, let's see, you DON'T have a body in your basement and that's a PROBLEM?  She hangs up on the baby vampire and muff-dives back in.

Sookie swings by Merlotte's to let Sam know she's going to Jackson for a few days.  He tells her about reuniting with his family and she brings him up to speed on Eggs's being shot in the parking lot.  Sam: I guess I'm glad there's only one bar in town.  She asks him to keep an eye on Jessica while she's gone and he threatens to give the vamp her job if she doesn't come back soon.

Arlene goes to the doctor and confirms that she is pregnant.  Trouble is, she's too far along (nine weeks at least) for the baby to be Terry's.  So whose?  Rene's?  Someone from the Maryann orgies?  When she tries to tell Terry, he assumes it's his and is so overjoyed that she just lets him believe it.  Meanwhile, the coroner - who apparently doubles as a funeral director - calls Tara to tell her that Eggs's funeral is today.  She runs to the cemetery and is saddened to see no one else there.  But Sookie is there - she paid for the funeral - and she holds Tara while they bury Eggs.  The camera pans back to an old gravestone: Thomas Compton.

Flashback to 1888.  Bill strides through the night to his home.  His wife, Carolann, is inside, terrified and alone.  She cries to see him because the war ended three years ago and when she didn't hear anything, she assumed he was dead.  She's additionally sad because their young son Thomas has just died from the pox.  Bill falls to his knees by the tiny coffin.  He cries and his tears are of blood because Lorena has already turned him.  Carolann struggles to understand this ... and then she runs for it, but Lorena catches her at the door.  Bill tries to calm his hysterical wife and Lorena just rolls her eyes, telling him that he's not helping things.  In the King of Mississippi's guest room, Bill wakes up from this remembrance/dream and falls back against the pillows, panting.

Jason has a nightmare about taking the policemen's exam with no pants on.  He's dozed off while on his road crew job.  When Lafayette wakes him up, he apologizes, saying he's got a lot on his mind.  Lafayette: "Yeah? Well, that must be somethin' new."  Then Hoyt starts screeching because the road crew just found a dead body in a culvert, headless and handless.  From the plaid flannel shirt it's wearing, I'm guessing this is Jessica's dead trucker.  Soon, Bon Temps entire police force is there - Sheriff Bud, Andy, Kenya and some other nerdy guy - staring at the latest dead body.  Bud announces that he's quitting: "43 years of this and what do I have to show for it?  Gaps in my brain and polyps in my ass.  I don't need this horsehit!"  He throws down his badge and stomps off.

Sookie goes back home and drags the living room rug out onto the porch.  As she scrubs at it, a figure moves behind her and she hears a growly voice think, "Must be her, blonde and pretty, no wonder the girl is a magnet for trouble."  She whirls and shrieks and runs from a very large, extremely attractive bearded man. He grabs her and tells her that it's okay, his name is Alcide Herveaux and Eric sent him to help her.  And yes, he's a werewolf.  A short time later over tea, Alcide tells her that he knows the pack she's sniffing after and she's going to need his help because they're a mean gang, a new gang in town.  Werewolves had lived in Jackson for 200 years without humans knowing it, but this new group - they're wicked bad news.  Plus, his ex-girlfriend is currently banging their leader.

Those white trash Mickenses have found their way from Arkansas to Sam's bar, much to his surprise and barely concealed dismay.  He sits them down in a booth and says he's buying them lunch.

Having fallen back asleep, Bill dreams/flashbacks some more.  Carolann is in shock.  Lorena chides Bill and reminds him that the human world and the vampire world cannot coexist.  Carolann begs him to kill her, to release her from her suffering.  Instead, he glamours his wife so she won't remember him.  Later that night, Bill buries his son.  Lorena tells him that truly the only way he can show his love for a human is to stay away ... forever.  We know where this is going, right?  He's going to break up with Sookie for her own protection.

Downstairs in the King's mansion, Cooter is all worked up because the wolf he sent to Bon Temps after Sookie hasn't gotten back yet.  Talbot smirks that all the werewolves are dumber than a box of rocks.  Cooter appeals to his king: "Sir, that's unfair."  Talbot:  "To boxes ... or rocks."  Heh.  Russell chides his companion and asks him to offer Cooter some refreshment.  Talbot stands and arches an eyebrow at the were: "Zima, correct?"  Double heh.  Talbot and Pam should have their own spin-off, or at least a snark contest.  Lorena sniffs that Eric Northman may have interfered with the wolf who was sent after Sookie.  Then Bill strolls in and pompously announces that he has considered the King's offer: for the safety of the humans he lives amongst, as well as for his own safety, he renounces his loyalty to the Queen of Louisiana and swear fealty to the King of Mississippi.  Lorena is miffed because she wanted to chew on Sookie but Russell, pleased with Bill's decision, tells her to stow it.

Sometime that night, a blaring car horn wakes Lafayette up.  It's Eric, in a fancy red convertible.  Lafayette says that he still needs more time to move the V but Eric cuts him off, apologizing for Pam's menacing behavior and offering the car as a gift to his best salesman.

At Merlotte's, Sam catches Joe Lee trying to give Tommy shots of booze and kicks them all out.  Later, after he's gone to bed, an alarm wakens him because someone has broken into the bar.  He catches Tommy trying to break into the safe but his little brother just turns into a hawk and flies out the broken window.

Franklin pays Jessica a visit.  He's got her dead trucker's head in a shopping bag.  He points out that since he helped her with her dead body problem, perhaps she could answer a few questions about Bill Compton for him.  That guy is one creepy-ass mofo.

Alcide brings Sookie to LuPine's, the oldest werewolf bar in Mississippi.  It's a biker bar and she's wearing a lacy white top; when she asks the bouncer (who seems to be chummy with Alcide) if she's dressed inappropriately, he tells her that she looks like dinner.  She and Alcide split up and she sashays over to the Nazi wolf gang that Alcide points out to her.  She gets them going a bit by saying Fangtasia is much scarier than this bar, plus what could possibly be stronger and tougher than a vampire, until one of the weres who kidnapped Bill drags her off into a back room.  She can't get him to think or say anything more about Bill so she screams until Alcide bursts in to rescue her.  There's a small bar fight, and Alcide gets his ass kicked until the bouncer breaks it up.  Afterwards, the bouncer tells Alcide that his ex, Debbie, is getting engaged to Cooter and the party is at LuPine's tomorrow night.  Alcide just shakes his head, sad.

Back in Bon Temps, Franklin has tracked Tara to Sookie's house.  She is shocked that he found and knows her name now - all thanks to Jessica.  She refuses to invite him in so he glamours her and gets his invitation that way.  Dude is sooooo sketchy.

At King Russell's mansion, Lorena lets herself in to Bill's bedroom.  When she mocks him for tricking the King into believing he'd give up Sookie, he reminds her that it was she who taught him that loving humans means hurting them.  He throws her up against the wall, growling that she's won., depriving him of his home and his humanity.  She kisses him and he hurls her onto the bed, ripping off her dress and thrusting himself savagely into her.  As they fuck, he twists her head around, breaking her neck, until she is facing backwards, and still she laughs and coos and tells him how much she loves him.  Horrified (me too, actually), Bill pulls back from her, clutches his head and screams.

Previously on True Blood / next time on True Blood

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